Wednesday, September 30, 2015

August Surprise

In early August, I got a crazy surprise. I found out that I am pregnant. What?! 

The past seven years have brought us: 
1 late term miscarriage 
6 years of infertility 
1 adoption, and just about to finalize another adoption

So how could I possibly be pregnant now? After all this time?

I didn't believe the first pregnancy test. It was about three years outdated and I figured it was just bad. So I bought two new tests. Both those were positive. I still didn't believe it! I talked my (reluctant) OB into ordering me a blood test. When that came back positive, I sort of believed it. I still thought I might just be having some kind of weird hormone issues (even though several, and very patient, nurse practitioners explained that if the blood test said I was pregnant, then I'm pregnant!) Two weeks later, we got an ultrasound and heard the heartbeat. Only then did I finally truly believe that I was pregnant. 

Now that I am 12 weeks, and past the high risk of miscarriage, I am finally starting to enjoy my pregnancy. It has finally sunk in that I am pregnant. But sometimes I still wake up in disbelief at my growing tummy. I'll look in the mirror to make sure it's not all in my head. That I am pregnant now after going through so much is incredible to me. 

Here's our story in a nutshell...
We had two boys 15 months apart and got unexpectedly pregnant with #3 when the youngest was just 9 months old. Three kids in 2 years was enough for us (we thought). so husband got a V. We lost the baby at 18 weeks. We were devastated. But still we were okay with two. 

Then God changed our hearts to desire a larger family, so husband got a reversal. Two years later, nothing. Turns out there was a problem with *me*. How ironic. So we turned to adoption. 

Our plan was to wait for a clean, low-risk adoption to come up. God's plan was for us to spend that time fostering babies. He changed my heart yet again to be happy caring for sweet babies I knew I would never keep. We cared for 10 babies and then got our Lucy. Then 4 more babies before our Katie came along. 

And now I'm pregnant. After 6 years of infertility. "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts." I am thankful that the Lord makes my plans and has written my story. His story is so much better than anything I could have imagined.

Here's our little Poppy at 11 weeks.  There's not much to see in the photo, but in person we heard a strong heartbeat and saw him wiggling all around. It is still so incredible to me!

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